Who is My Brother? (Not Who Some Think.)

Compliments are GREAT THINGS. Both for the giver and the recipient. Compliments can bring life, joy, energy, confidence and blessing.

Earlier this week I took my son to a nearby medical clinic. He had been experiencing some symptoms of what turned out to be strep throat. After a decent wait in the waiting room, we finally heard those welcome words from the lady at the door which led back to the exam rooms. “Ethan Bryan.”

That meant it was our turn!

When we entered the exam room, there was only one bench to sit on. Ethan took the seat, and I stood nearby. Shortly after, noticing there was no place for me to sit, the nurse said to Ethan, “Your brother is welcome to sit next to you, too.”

That’s right. “Brother!”

It was an unintended compliment, but a compliment nonetheless. At almost-40, I have entered the age bracket where looking younger than you are is a good thing! When I told her I was Ethan’s father, she commented on how young I looked (and in that word “young” I chose to hear “good-looking,” “ripped” and “athletic”).

Ethan is feeling better now, anxious to forget how he felt and ready to hit the basketball courts again. But I will remember that “compliment” for some time.

Because it reminds me of the power of a compliment.

Proverbs 25:11 observes: “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”

This truism applies to apt words of all kinds (apt words of encouragement, rebuke, warning, celebration, and more). But it also speaks to the power of a compliment.

So how are you doing at handing out apt compliments these days?

“You look nice.”

“You are great to work for.”

“I admire your sense of humor.”

“I admire your creativity.”

“I admire your athleticism.”

“I admire your wisdom.”

“I admire the way you think, or the way you parent, or the way you handled that situation.”

“You are a wonderful friend.”

“I have great respect for your ability to ….”

“You are the best….”

“You inspire me to….”

“You are a wonderful, Godly person.”

The power of an apt compliment. It’s like apples of gold in settings of silver.

So will you aptly compliment someone today….everyday?

LISTS 2010

Here are my Top Five lists from 2010. If I am faithful to do this for the next fifty years, it's gonna be great fun and very meaningful to look back on these annual posts.

Top Five Movies I Saw:

(I probably only watched a dozen movies—rented and at a theater—all year, so my pool to choose from is relatively small)
1. A-Team and Star Trek (two fun movies based on 80s shows)

2. The Book of Eli

3. The Last Song and Letters to God (two movies with many similarities)

4. Lie to Me (first two seasons of this intriguing TV show…on DVD)

5. Food, Inc. and King Corn (two movies, similar hard-hitting impact)

Top Five Websites I Visited:
1. Ted.com
2. Ajc.com / CNN.com / USATODAY.com
3. Pandora.com
4. CBSsportsline.com

5. FastCompany.com

Honorable Mention: FollowTheRabbi.com

Top Five Books I Read:

1. To Change the World: The Irony, Tragedy, and Possibility of Christianity in the Late Modern World by James Davison Hunter

2. Engaging the Powers: Discernment and Resistance in a World of Domination by Walter Wink

3. Knowing Christ Today: Why We Can Trust Spiritual Knowledge by Dallas Willard

4. Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand

5. The Little Big Things: 163 Ways to Pursue Excellence by Tom Peters

Honorable Mentions:

What Good Is God: In Search of a Faith That Matters by Philip Yancey

Justice: What’s the Right Thing to Do by Michael J. Sandel

The Power of a Whisper by Bill Hybels

Top Five Restaurants I Ate At:
1. Subway

2. Sweet Tomatoes

3. The Cheesecake Factory

4. Taco Mac (more for the football than the food)

5. Starbucks (not a restaurant and hot chocolate isn’t a meal, but I frequented no eating establishment more often)

Top Five Things I'm Really Glad I Spent My Time Doing:

1. Growing my relationship with my wife and children

2. Being with my church family on Sunday mornings.
3. Tutoring kids at Esther Jackson Elementary School and helping to fund the digging of freshwater wells in Africa
4. Spending time with friends

5. Reading

Fifteen Great Memories

1. Attending my son’s football and basketball games and playing ping pong with him in our basement

2. Tucking my daughter in at night, picking her up from school, and riding bikes with her in the neighborhood

3. Playing Yahtzee, watching movies, and times of laughter with my wife

4. Thanksgiving Day with 31 relatives in North Carolina

5. Two Hilton Head Island vacations with family and an afternoon Braves Game with my dad

6. Teaching from the scriptures on Sunday mornings and 10:30am discussions with the high school group

7. Talking on the phone with my parents

8. Dedicating my nephew, William, to God

9. Sunday nights at Taco Mac with friends

10. Early morning conversations with friends over coffee, Wednesday lunches over backgammon with Carlos, dozens of phone conversations with SteveW

11. A Wells for Africa jug filled with coins and surrounded by smiling faces of children

12. A wonderful, warm and perfect Christmas brunch with my church family at Altobelli’s

13. Conversations with George and Dianne

14. A blistering hot August Braves game with friends

15. Christmas Day Snow

The Deep End

Over the past few weeks I've been re-reading Eugene Peterson's book, Christ Plays in Ten Thousand Places. It's worth a second read....and a third. When I came to page 310, I read an already heavily underlined section, with notes in the margin. It's just great, and I used the quote below to begin my teaching last Sunday at church.

“Anyone who joins a church expecting to be part of a happy and harmonious gathering of put-together people sooner or later is in for serious disappointment. We can also suspect that such a person hasn’t read the Scriptures very carefully. There are exceptions, occasionally quite glorious exceptions, but Christian communities, all of them are communities-in-progress, baptized sinners in various stages of development in the life of love.

“Men and women are not admitted to the community by presenting credentials of love skills, nor do we maintain our place in the community by passing periodic peer reviews on love. We are here to be formed over our lifetimes into a community of the beloved, God’s beloved who are being formed into a people who love God and one another in the way and on the terms in which God loves us.

“It’s slow work. We are slow learners. And though God is unendingly patient with us, we are not very patient with one another. Outsiders, observing our embarrassingly slow and erratic progress in love, wonder why we bother. Well, we bother because God is love: he created us in love; he saved us in an act of love; he commanded us to love one another.

“Love is the ocean in which we swim. So what if many of us can only wade in the shallows, and others of us can barely dog paddle for short distances? We are learning and we see the possibility of one day taking long, relaxed, easy strokes into the deep.”

I love this passage because it communicates so well what lies at the heart of a God-designed life: living as a beloved child of God and growing in that love so that we can pass it along to others.

I love Peterson’s words because they summarize our church’s (and my own) raison d'être. And even more, they describe what I actually see going on among our church....i.e. we are fulfilling our life purpose!

I am part of a phenomenal church community. And we are learning, slowly and imperfectly, but surely, to take long, relaxed strokes in the deepness of God’s kingdom of love and grace. We are learning about how to truly live the blessed life! How great it is!

Wells for Africa: Coins Edition

Last weekend my church ended a four-week season of thinking about, praying for, and donating money towards the building of our 9th freshwater well in Africa. The weekend was highlighted by two events. On Saturday we invited friends and neighbors and enjoyed an outdoor benefit, "Concert in the Courtyard," with live music and tasty BBQ'd burgers with all the fixings you can imagine. And the children got a bonus of playing on an outdoor playground and zip line.

And then on Sunday our church gathered for a big Wells for Africa Celebration, highlighted by worship music, teaching and the bringing of all our coins to drop in the "Wells for Africa" water jug. Coins came from everywhere--underneath sofas, in cars, in dresser and kitchen drawers, inside Tupperware containers and piggy banks (see picture).

The Sunday celebration will undoubtedly go down as one of the most memorable weekend services in our church's history! I will never forget the joy on every child's face as we filled the large water jug full to overflowing with coins for the digging of our 9th well. (In coins alone, we raised just under $1,000.) And I will always be grateful and strengthened in my faith when I remember the moving experience of singing "How Great Is Our God" alongside so many friends, as we celebrated God's goodness and his undeniable presence among us that day.

I know Halloween is still a couple days away, but it feels like we got an early jump on the Thanksgiving season!

I Found An Acorn

I found an acorn on the ground a few days ago. It was a perfectly formed acorn, olive-green with its “hat still on,” as my daughter put it. I looked at it for a few moments and then put it in my pocket. I’ve paused to look at it many times since the day I found it. There is something about that acorn that reminds me of God’s perfection, his love of beauty and his love for me.

And it reminded me that if we’ll stop and notice, there are signs of God’s love and perfection everywhere…
• In a smile.
• A hug.
• The fresh breeze that undeniably hints of autumn’s arrival
• Two scoops of Breyer’s Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream.
• A pine cone.
• A freshly washed and waxed red sports car.
• A clear, blue sky
• The night sky
• A U.S. Open tennis match…the athletes, the New York night, the crowd
• The smell of freshly cut grass
• A firm, sweet strawberry
• A hot shower
• A glass of ice water, especially when you're really thirsty
• A bird, a squirrel, a deer, a butterfly, a dog and even a cat
• A soft pillow
• A firm handshake
• Laughter
• A campfire
• In an olive-green acorn with its “hat still on”

The list is endless. Have you stopped? Have you noticed?